Monday, June 02, 2003

Hey by the way!

The US government has caught an acutal terrorist!!! Did he attack the World Trade Center? No. Is he from Afghanistan? Saudia Arabia? Iraq? No, no, and no. Is he, at least, a Muslim? No.

This guy committed his most recent (alleged) crime in 1998. He has been hiding, apparently, in the Smokey Mountains (i.e. right under our collective fucking nose) since.

It took 5 years to catch him.

Thank GOD we've got that Homeland Security thing up and running!

Incidentally, he was caught "rummaging" behind a supermarket in Murphy, NC. There are states (Oklahoma is one) where there is a chain of supermakets called "Homeland". Coincidence? I think not.

Also, if you've never been white water rafting, but have always wanted to try, a nice beginner river is located right near Murphy: the Nantahala. Enjoy it. You'll enjoy it more if you do EXACTLY what the person running the boat tells you to do (I say this in case the asshole businessman from Minnesota who almost got my paddle imprint on the back of his head in 1991 is reading this).

I heard "Coast to Coast" by Scorpions, "Jerusalem" by Dan Bern, "Midnight Confessions" by the Grass Roots, and "Doctor" by INXS (I couldn't be a doctor. I couldn't be a lawyer. I couldn't be a scientist. I couldn't be normal, especially in the daylight.).


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